Some World Cup Preview Thing

It’s about that time. THE WORLD CUP IS HERE. So let’s all get drunk in the morning and watch soccer. Of course, I’m not an expert in this field, I’m just really knowledgable. Some of the picks I have are different, unorthodox, not what the real “experts” say, or a little biased. So what? It’s my blog, I’ll write whatever I want.

Group A
France
Mexico
South Africa
Uruguay

Despite the fanfare around some of these teams (France getting in on a basketball assist by Thierry Henry, South Africa being the host, Mexico being supported by myself), this group is probably one of the weaker on paper. There really isn’t a standout team, just a few slightly above-average squads. Despite having elite talent at practically every position, France’s lack of chemistry had been a huge issue during qualifying, as they shit the bed and barely got to the Cup. It’ll be interesting to see how the 2006 runners-up do in the group. All bias aside, Mexico needs its attack to thrive (led by youngsters Giovani Dos Santos, Carlos Vela, Andres Guardado, and 37-year old migrant worker Cuauhtemoc Blanco) in order to compensate with a merely average defense. As the hosts, South Africa (or Bafana Bafana, the best team name in the tournament) will try to avoid being the first host nation to be eliminated in the group stage. However, Everton standout Steven Pienaar won’t nearly be enough. Uruguay plays exciting attacking football (3-man defence = fun) and is banking on its nasty striking duo of Diego Forlan and Luis Suarez to put the ball in the net.

Advancing: Mexico, France


Group B
Argentina
Greece
South Korea
Nigeria

It’s Diego Maradona’s time to shine. As coach, at least. The Argentine playing legend has a roster full of talent but will be pushed to make them work cohesively together. Any team with Lionel Messi will advance out of the group stage, so that’s set in stone. Greece hasn’t really been good since their upset in the 2004 European Championships and will probably get one or two points from draws (ties, for you Americans). With the exception of South Korea eight years ago (coached by mastermind Guus Hiddink), Asian teams are awful in the World Cup; don’t expect much from this year’s edition. Nigeria has awesome talents distributed across the field (Joseph Yobo and Taye Taiwo on defense, Yakubu up top) and will definitely make a good push for second place.

Advancing: Argentina, Nigeria


Group C
Algeria
England
Slovenia
United States

This is where the American “fans” will pay attention. Let’s just say England and the U.S. will make it out of the group. I really can’t support Algeria or Slovenia; their team depths are lacking and inferior in nature. The winner of the USA-England game will win the group, hands down. However, I do think that England is too good for the Stars and Stripes. Sorry, guys.

Advancing: England, United States


Group D
Australia
Germany
Ghana
Serbia

Many people have been saying that the group with Brazil, Portugal, and Ivory Coast is the “Group of Death.” I disagree; all four teams here have the ability to not just advance, but actually win the group. Australia, led by Tim Cahill, play a rigid defensive game and could definitely capitalize on teams’ mistakes here. Germany has a high powered attack led by Lukas Podolski, Miroslav Klose, and Bastian Schweinsteiger (a name that sounds 100 times cooler in a German accent) and will probably win this group. Ghana is arguably the African team with the best stability and chemistry. Despite losing Michael Essien to injury, the Black Stars might just come in second here in Group D. However, Serbia is looking like a prime upset special. Led by Nemanja Vidic and Branislav Ivanovic in defense, the Serbs have a nasty style of play and have the personnel to win games in the same fashion as Inter Milan in this year’s Champions League final (play tough defense and rely on counter-attacks). I like them a lot (no homo.)

Advancing: Germany, Serbia


Group E
Cameroon
Denmark
Japan
Netherlands

Not a pretty group at first sight, but these four teams could end up playing some of the best football in the tournament. Cameroon and Denmark have great attacking options (Samuel Eto’o comes to mind for Cameroon, Nicklas Bendtner for the Danes) and play free-flowing football. Japan could be somewhat of a surprise, as they barely lost to England in last week’s friendly; they will definitely keep these games close. Finally, the Netherlands are just plain nasty. Van Persie, Van der Vaart, Sneijder, and Kuyt in attack; let the goals commence. The Dutch defense is just a little suspect though…

Advancing: Netherlands, Cameroon


Group F
Italy
New Zealand
Paraguay
Slovakia

Really just an ugly group, period. The defending champions, Italy has a team with an average age of 58. Okay, it seems like it, but there’s really not a lot of youth on this squad. It would be a damn shame if the Italians didn’t advance through. New Zealand is absolutely the worst team in the tournament and is “just happy to be here.” Paraguay plays nice football, with an impressive duo of Roque Santa Cruz and Oscar Cardozo (who gets a Miguelon Stamp of Approval) for strikers. Slovakia doesn’t have a lot of household names, but Marek Hamsik of Napoli will help commandeer these guys to a second-place finish.

Advancing: Italy, Slovakia


Group G
Brazil
Ivory Coast
North Korea
Portugal

The original “Group of Death.” And then you realize that A) Didier Drogba will barely be at half strength in time for the World Cup, B) North Korea is shite, and C) Portugal doesn’t have enough consistency at forward to be a contender for the championship. Liedson just doesn’t cut it. Of course, Brazil is one of the two favorites to win the whole thing, so you can’t really discount that. As head coach, all Dunga does is win. He’s not T-Pain though… I forecast the Ivory Coast-Portugal winner to be in second place at the end of the group stage.

Advancing: Brazil, Portugal


Group H
Chile
Honduras
Spain
Switzerland

Other than the second favorite to win it all (the Red Fury of Spain), this group is relatively nondescript. Chile and Honduras play crazy minimal-defense football and will rack up goals, and Switzerland will play your typical European style; wide crossing, occasional counter attacks, tough defense). I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that Chile will have the cojones to advance out of here.

Advancing: Spain, Chile



Round of 16

Mexico over Nigeria
Serbia over England (you’re damn right this will happen)
Netherlands over Slovakia
Brazil over Chile
Argentina over France
Germany over United States (at least the Americans had a good run)
Italy over Cameroon
Spain over Portugal (this may just be one of the best games in years)


Quarterfinals

Mexico over Serbia (wishful thinking)
Brazil over Netherlands (number of goals in this match: at least 5)
Germany over Argentina
Spain over Italy


Semifinals

Brazil over Mexico (if this matchup actually happens and Mexico wins, I would NUT)
Germany over Spain (I need another upset… Germany barely lost to Spain in the EURO ’08 final)


Final

Brazil over Germany



Awards

Golden Ball (best player): Bastian Schweinsteiger, Germany (a player from a non-Cup winning team has won this the last two tournaments)
Golden Shoe (top goal scorer): Luis Fabiano, Brazil
Yashin Award (best goalkeeper): Julio Cesar, Brazil
Bets Young Player (21 years old or younger): Giovani Dos Santos, Mexico